Gloria in Community?

From the Chapel at Shepherd's Field

Here in Israel/Palestine, my pilgrimage with my three pastors friends is proving to be a challenge to my spirituality. It's not that I don't enjoy them or that we have not already traveled to deep spiritual places in the over 10+ years we have been together. I do love each one deeply and we certainly have traversed quite a bit of sickness, sorrow, and joy in our covenant community. 

It seems the problem for me is that I have gotten used to solitude here in Bethlehem. While I have new found friends and family here, I still spend much of my time alone - thinking, reflecting, and exploring. Even when I'm with people, I am fairly alone with my thoughts. The language barrier means that communication takes on other forms. I communicate in the universal language of play with the kids. In church, it is our mutual love for God that unites us. Out in the community, I am learning to give as well as receive the warm embrace of Palestinian hospitality. As Richard Rohr suggests, this is the mystical experience of going deeper, living not on the surface but discovering and dwelling in the depths - wordless depths. 

So perhaps the problem is not suddenly being surrounded by people I love but the many, many, many words that I now need to process and am expected to contribute. It's as if the words are forcing me back into my head and away from that deeper sensitivity of soul-to-soul communion. I'm returning to a form of communication that, while efficient, is not as rich.

So it was with new appreciation of wordless awe that I was drawn to the shepherds' story. In Luke 2, it says that the shepherds were surrounded by the glory of God. Long before angel choirs and even angel messengers sang and spoke, the shepherds experienced the profound wonder of God - together. The glory of God lit up the atmosphere, penetrated their souls, and they trembled in the presence of God.

Perhaps that is what I'm longing for with my beloved sisters in Christ - shared awe. An experience where words are not needed but a moment where we would know that we have experienced the glory of God - together.